What Billie Eilish’s ‘NDA’ Song Lyrics Mean

Fitness

Billie Eilish released a candid new single from her upcoming album Happier Than Ever last night—a song she and her brother FINNEAS wrote that offered an honest assessment of dating and navigating her life while famous.

Eilish lyrically referenced the stalker she got a five-year restraining order against (“Had to save my money for security/Got a stalker walkin’ up and down the street/Says he’s Satan and he’d like to meet.”) The man, according to court documents reviewed by E!, “harassed and threatened” Eilish while parked at a school across from her family’s home. Eilish wrote in her declaration that whenever he saw her, “he always says something to me or makes a sign or a gesture directed to me… For example, he recently made a throat slitting gesture to me as I was backing my car into my driveway. I interpreted this as [him] wanting to violently harm me in some way.”

Overall, the song is a harrowing look into life as a celebrity—and was therapeutic to Eilish herself. Eilish spoke to Zane Lowe on Apple Music 1 about the creation of “NDA” and its feel.

I love it,” she said. “I’m so happy that it’s seeing the light of day. It came from that [does sound] We had that, we only had that. Finneas made that, just that. We were just messing around, and he just made that, and we were like, ‘Oh!’ And it just was that … and it was way slower and pitched down. It was really slow, this crazy… And we would just listen to it, and we would just walk around the room feeling it. And it was such a feeler. Oh my God, I kept picturing visuals for it. And I kept picturing legs, and girls and shapes, and darkness, and this cool. And I was just like, ‘We have to make something to this, because this is a waste otherwise.’ We literally made that whole song in two days or something, a day, I don’t know. But it was a fun, satisfying-ass process. It was very, very fulfilling.”

Here, the lyrics of “NDA” to take in, via Genius, along with its music video that Eilish directed. She called the project “one of the coolest videos I’ve ever made in my life, and I directed it. It was pretty crazy, it’s real too.”

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Verse 1
Did you think I’d show up in a limousine? (No)
Had to save my money for security
Got a stalker walkin’ up and down the street
Says he’s Satan and he’d like to meet
I bought a secret house when I was seventeen (Hah)
Haven’t had a party since I got the keys
Had a pretty boy over, but he couldn’t stay
On his way out I made him sign an NDA, mm
Yeah, I made him sign an NDA
Once was good enough
‘Cause I don’t want him having shit to say-ay, ayy, ayy, ayy-ayy

Chorus

You couldn’t save me, but you can’t let me go, oh, no
I can crave you, but you don’t need to know, oh-oh

Verse 2

Mm-mm, mm-mm
Thirty under thirty for another year (Another year)
I can barely go outside, I think I hate it herе (Think I hate it here)
Maybе I should think about a new career
Somewhere in Kaua’i where I can disappear
I’ve been havin’ fun (Fun, fun, fun) gettin’ older now
Didn’t change my number, made him shut his mouth
At least I gave him something he can cry about
I thought about my future, but I want it now, oh-oh
Want it now, mm-mm-mm
You can’t give me up

Chorus

You couldn’t save me, but you can’t let me go, oh, no
I can crave you, but you don’t need to know, oh-oh

Outro

Did I take it too far? (Did I take it too far?)
Now I know what you are (Are)
You hit me so hard (So hard)
I saw stars (I saw stars)
Think I took it too far (Too far)
When I sold you my heart (My heart)
How’d it get so dark? (So dark)
I saw stars (I saw stars)
Stars (Stars)

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